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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27093994">here with me, stay with me</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonlightBreeze/pseuds/MoonlightBreeze'>MoonlightBreeze</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Whumptober 2020 [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Supergirl (TV 2015)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Alex Danvers &amp; Kara Danvers Sibling Feels, Alex Danvers &amp; Maggie Sawyer in Love, Alex Danvers Needs a Hug, And she gets that hug, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer, F/F, Hospitalization, Hurt Maggie Sawyer, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Major Character Injury, Missions Gone Wrong, My First Work in This Fandom, Protective Kara Danvers, Whumptober 2020, and now for the serious ones, no beta we die like men</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-10-19</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-09 03:34:46</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,494</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27093994</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/MoonlightBreeze/pseuds/MoonlightBreeze</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When Maggie is hurt in the field and threatened with a fate worse than death, Alex takes the news hard and retreats to the training room. Kara, however, isn't going to let her sister blame herself for Maggie's situation. </p><p> </p><p>Whumptober 2020 prompt fic - Science gone wrong</p><p>Happy/hopeful ending!!</p><p>Warnings for major character injury and implied/referenced self-harm. Please keep yourselves safe!! &lt;3</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Alex Danvers &amp; J'onn J'onzz | Hank Henshaw, Alex Danvers &amp; Kara Danvers, Alex Danvers/Maggie Sawyer</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series:</b></td><td>Whumptober 2020 [15]</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Series URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/series/1950094</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>44</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>here with me, stay with me</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hey, guys! The Whumptober prompt for this fic is: science gone wrong. I just started rewatching Supergirl and I was hit with Sanvers feels as I made my way into season 2. So, naturally, I decided to incorporate them into a Whumptober prompt. </p><p>This is my first time writing Supergirl fanfiction and I really hope I did the characters justice! I apologise if they're OOC. I will probably write more Supergirl fanfiction in the future, maybe even more for Whumptober, (Alex Danvers is my child and I still want a chance to dive into her trauma + angst Maggie a little bit). </p><p>Warnings for this fic include: major character injury, implied/referenced self-harm, hospitalization, violence (not graphic).</p><p>I really hope you like this!! Kudos make my day and comments validate my existence, so please feel free to leave those, if you want :) And, as always, I hope you have a wonderful day/night!</p><p>~ Em</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <em>“We should be who we are and we should kiss the girls that we want to kiss.”</em>
</p><p>Alex didn’t think Maggie wanted to kiss her right now. She didn’t even think she <em>could</em>. </p><p>“J’onn, we have to help her,” Alex mumbled, not taking her eyes off of her comatose girlfriend. Maggie’s face was torn to pieces by the claws of a rogue alien, and nothing the medical team was doing to fix it was working. In fact, what they <em>had </em>done was making Maggie’s situation worse. Her lips were curled into a snarl that Alex was unused to seeing on her girlfriend’s face, and she couldn’t help but feel as if it was her fault that Maggie was slowly turning into the crazed monster that had attacked her.</p><p>Alex could see the edges of thick white bandages wrapped around Maggie’s torso, and a wave of self-loathing rushed like poison through her veins. She should have <em>helped </em>her, saved her, kept this from happening to the girlfriend she’d just started falling in love with. </p><p>“We will,” J’onn promised from beside her. He placed a comforting hand on Alex’s shoulder. “I promise.”</p><p>Alex bit her lip and stroked her fingers through Maggie’s ebony-coloured hair, pressing her thumb to Maggie’s cheek with every smooth swipe. She was still beautiful, even like this. She’d been beautiful after the alien had attacked her, when her face was covered in blood and she had howled in pain. She was even beautiful after the medical team had given her an experimental drug and reverse engineered her DNA to that of the alien that had attacked her. Nothing could dull Maggie’s beauty. But it was dulling her light, her humanity, and even though she knew it was selfish, Alex couldn’t bear to see it. </p><p>“I’m going to go train,” she announced, pulling away from Maggie and making her way to the door without looking at J’onn. “Watch over her for me?”</p><p>“Of course,” J’onn replied. He hesitated, then reached out and grabbed Alex’s arm before she could leave. “Promise you won’t overdo it? This isn’t your fault.”</p><p>Alex said nothing, pulling her arm free from J’onn’s grasp and slamming the door behind her. </p><p>The other agents gave her a wide berth, but Winn had no such survival instinct. “Alex,” he called from his place at the DEO computer. “How is she?”</p><p>“Same as before,” Alex responded numbly. “No change.”</p><p>Winn sighed. “I’m sorry.”</p><p>Alex shrugged. “Not your fault.” </p><p>“I’m still sorry.”</p><p>Alex ignored him and continued towards the DEO training room, slipping her gloves on over her hands. Winn followed, and she could see his growing concern with each step she took towards the training room and away from her girlfriend. </p><p>“Alex, hey, hey, are you sure that’s a good idea right now?” He gestured to her gloves. </p><p>“Leave me alone, Winn,” Alex replied tersely. </p><p>“I just think that maybe you - ”</p><p>“Well, I don’t give a damn what you think!” Alex snapped, whirling around and pinning Winn to the wall with one arm. “Leave me the fuck alone!”</p><p>Winn sighed, not appearing at all afraid of the 5’9’’ DEO agent glowering over him. He shoved Alex’s arm, and she released him, conflicting emotions swirling in her gut. She didn’t know what to do, and the interfering IT guy who thought he knew what was best for her wasn’t fucking helping. </p><p>“Fine,” Winn said, holding his hands up in a gesture of surrender. “But if Kara asks where you are, I’m not lying for you.” With that, he walked back to his computer without sparing Alex another glance. Alex cursed and continued on her way to the training room. </p><p>The DEO’s training room was unlike any Alex had ever found herself in before she was recruited. The walls were lined with different kinds of weapons, and there was a small door that led to a closet full of suits and armour to simulate different aliens’ shielding defenses. Usually, the training room was used by two people at once to practice fighting different alien races, but it could also be used solo. </p><p>Alex jabbed her gloved hand onto the button for their training AI and watched as it blinked to life. </p><p>“Hello, Agent Danvers,” the AI, Missy, greeted her. “How may I assist you today?”</p><p>“Run Battle Simulation 538,” Alex instructed it. </p><p>“Running Battle Simulation 538,” the AI recited. </p><p>The training room lights darkened until Alex could barely make out her own hand in front of her face, and a few hologram projections of Brevakk aliens appeared before her. She clenched her fists inside her gloves and got to work. </p><p>Brevakks were known for being ruthless and violent, and Alex had to use every ounce of her dexterity to avoid being slashed by the hologram Brevakks’ spikes. She knew that, in here, she could make mistakes, but she was training so she didn’t make mistakes in the field. She threw a punch to the first hologram, and it realistically collapsed to its knees. Alex mimed slapping a pair of handcuffs on the alien, having memorised the amount of time it generally took to do so a long time ago. She had to keep her simulations as realistic as possible. </p><p>To her annoyance but not surprise, the other hologram attacked her while she was “handcuffing” the first, and she was thrown across the training room with the force of its blow. She hit the wall with a groan and a thud, cracking the back of her skull on the concrete. Technically, DEO agents weren’t supposed to use battle simulations without a partner, for safety reasons, but Alex was the agency’s highest-ranking agent besides J’onn, and he was currently watching over Maggie in the infirmary. </p><p>No other member of the DEO would have the guts to tell Alex she needed to follow regulations. </p><p>Alex got up and charged at the alien hologram, remembering to stop just short of its body so she didn’t fly right through it and into the wall. She landed a punch to the hologram’s ribs, which made it emit a loud screech and whirl away from her. She grit her teeth and chased after it, taking a second to glance over at the spot where the other hologram had been; it was gone now, which meant that the battle simulation had recognised it as defeated. She allowed herself a brief, grim smile of satisfaction. </p><p>“Alex, what are you doing?” Kara’s voice rang out, and Alex’s shoulders sagged. <em>Busted</em>. </p><p>“Nothing,” she groused. “Just training.”</p><p>Kara rolled her eyes. “Sure you are.” With that, she stepped into the training room and said, “End simulation,” loud and clear. Alex clenched her jaw and glared at her adoptive sister. </p><p>“What’d you do that for?”</p><p>“You’re going to hurt yourself,” Kara said, and her voice was soft and gentle, almost pleading. “You know you overtrain when you’re upset.”</p><p>“That’s nobody’s business but mine,” Alex snapped, taking off her gloves to examine her knuckles. They weren’t bruised or bloody, so she shoved them in Kara’s direction like some sort of trophy. “See? I’m fine.”</p><p>“You have a wound on the back of your head,” Kara responded dryly. “It’s not bad enough to concuss you, but it easily could have been.”</p><p>“So the alien tossed me around a bit,” Alex said, shrugging. “It doesn’t matter; I’m fine.”</p><p>“Alex, just stop,” Kara begged. “Please. Stop pretending. It’s <em>me</em>.”</p><p>Alex took a deep, shaky breath, avoiding her sister’s gaze. Tears burned the back of her eyelids, and she blinked furiously. She didn’t deserve to cry. It was her fault that Maggie was even in this situation to begin with. She should have been there to protect her when the alien attacked, she shouldn’t have let the infirmary give her that experimental drug, she should have, should have done <em>something</em> -</p><p>“Alex, this isn’t your fault,” Kara said fiercely, grabbing Alex’s shoulders in a bruising, just short of superhuman, grip. </p><p>“Yes, it is,” Alex mumbled. “It’s all my fault, Kara.”</p><p>“No, it isn’t,” Kara argued. “You couldn’t have known the murder call was an alien. You couldn’t have known what that drug would do to her. You couldn’t have <em>known</em>, Alex. This isn’t anybody’s fault but the alien who attacked her, and he’s in custody. He’s not going to hurt anyone ever again.”</p><p>Alex nodded, just barely. “Y-You’re right.” Self-loathing still scorched her veins like fire, but she felt like a little bit of the weight on her shoulders had been lifted. Kara was right. She <em>couldn’t </em>have known. </p><p>“Alex!” J’onn called out from the infirmary. “In here!”</p><p>Alex ran towards the medical wing, her heart pounding painfully in her chest. She didn’t know what she would do if she lost Maggie. She <em>couldn’t </em>lose Maggie. She loved her. Alex barely had time to realise the magnitude of what she’d just thought to herself before she and Kara were skidding to a stop next to the infirmary, piling through the door, and crowding around Maggie’s bed. </p><p>“She’s becoming human again,” J’onn said, wonder in his voice. “Lena managed to come up with another drug that reverses the effects of the one she was given.”</p><p>Alex heaved a sigh of relief, allowing the tears that she had been holding back to fall. Kara wrapped an arm around her shoulders and J’onn squeezed her hand. Maggie was going to be okay. And as soon as she woke up, Alex had a few things she wanted to say to her. </p><p>~ ~ ~</p><p>Later that evening, Maggie began to stir. Alex sat bolt upright, clutching her girlfriend’s hand like a lifeline. She’d been by Maggie’s bedside since J’onn told her the news that morning. J’onn and Kara had gone home a few hours ago, but Alex wasn’t going to leave until she knew Maggie would be okay. </p><p>“Heya, Danvers,” Maggie said, blinking herself awake groggily. </p><p>“Maggie,” Alex breathed tearfully. She reached forward and pulled Maggie into her arms, burying her face in the other woman’s hair. “I was so scared,” she confessed, tightening their embrace. “I-I was so worried you weren’t going to wake up.” </p><p>“You can’t get rid of me that easy,” Maggie replied, wrapping her arms around Alex eagerly. She breathed in the scent of the woman she loved - and she could say that now, she did <em>love </em>Alex - and let out a shaky exhale. Almost dying was never fun, but it was always worse when she had someone she cared about waiting for her on the other side. </p><p>“So, what happened?” Maggie asked, pulling away just enough to meet Alex’s eyes. “I remember getting roughed up by that alien, but it’s all white noise after that.”</p><p>“The medical staff gave you an experimental drug,” Alex recounted tearfully. “They said your face would be scarred forever if they didn’t administer it.” She grabbed Maggie’s hands in her own and looked down at her lap, too afraid to meet her girlfriend’s eyes. “And I was stupid and I let them, even though I’d still love you with your face like that, and the drug almost turned you into the same monster that attacked you.”</p><p>Maggie’s breath caught in her throat, her eyes widening. “So, so how did you cure me?”</p><p>“Lena Luthor,” Alex replied. “She made another drug to counteract the effects of the first one.”</p><p>“Thank god,” Maggie breathed. She pulled Alex in for another hug and rested her forehead on her girlfriend’s shoulder. “Will my face go back to normal now?”</p><p>“Yes,” Alex responded, giving her a reassuring squeeze. “That was another property of Lena’s drug. It should heal in a few weeks and return to the way it was before. It won’t even leave a scar.”</p><p>Maggie smiled and brushed her lips across Alex’s collarbone. “Tell her thank you for me next time you see her.”</p><p>“Will do.”</p><p>They stayed like that for a few minutes, content to hold each other and keep each other safe until the night ended. Maggie’s fingers strayed up Alex’s spine and to her hair, playing with the auburn strands. When her hand grazed a swollen lump and Alex winced, however, she pulled back and raised an inquisitive eyebrow at her girlfriend.</p><p>“I...may have went a little bonkers while you were out,” Alex admitted. </p><p>“Alexandra Danvers, what did you do?”</p><p>“Nothing bad!” Alex hastened to reassure her. “Not really, anyway.”</p><p>“<em>Alex</em>.”</p><p>“Okay, okay, I ran a battle simulation and got a little beat up by the alien holograms,” Alex admitted. “Kara came in and stopped me before I could do any real damage.”</p><p>“Dammit, you know you’re supposed to have a partner for those!” Maggie snapped, her eyes flashing. “What were you thinking?! You could have died!”</p><p>“You could have, too!” Alex shouted, her eyes filling with tears. She sagged forward, collapsing into Maggie’s arms. “You could have, too.”</p><p>“But I didn’t,” Maggie said slowly. “I didn’t die. I’m right here, Alex.”</p><p>“I know,” Alex breathed, and it came out a choked sob. “I know you are, I know you didn’t, but, but I just thought that you <em>might</em>. W-When you were out. I thought you might die, Maggie. I didn’t know what to do with that.”</p><p>“So you thought hurting yourself was the answer?” Maggie’s voice was soft, free of judgement, and it washed over Alex like a cool summer rain. </p><p>“No,” Alex replied defensively. Maggie tightened her arms around her, an ‘it’s-okay’ if Alex had ever heard one. She sighed. “I-I don’t know, Mags.” She bit her lip and mumbled, “It’s always worked in the past.”</p><p>“Oh, baby,” Maggie breathed. “Baby, no. Alex, that isn’t the answer. That’s <em>never </em>the answer.”</p><p>“I know,” Alex admitted. “I know it doesn’t help anyone and I know I should have been working on finding a cure for you instead of getting my ass handed to me in the training room, but I - ”</p><p>“No, no, that’s not what I meant,” Maggie said, shaking her head fiercely. “I meant that you should never hurt yourself on purpose, Alex. You don’t deserve that.”</p><p>Alex exhaled shakily. “Yeah, well, sometimes I feel like I do.”</p><p>Maggie gave her girlfriend a reassuring squeeze and said, “We’ll work on that. For now, you need to get some rest. I know you’ve been here all night.”</p><p>“No, I’m not leaving you - ”</p><p>“Who said anything about leaving me? Get in here, Danvers.”</p><p>Alex couldn’t contain the grin that lit up her face at Maggie’s words, and she crawled into bed next to her girlfriend, laying her head on the other woman’s chest. </p><p>“I’m glad you’re okay,” Alex whispered. </p><p>“Yeah, me too,” Maggie whispered back. “After all, I have you to come home to now.”</p><p>Alex smiled, and she could feel Maggie smiling, too, even under the cover of darkness. “Yeah, you do.” She closed her eyes and sought out Maggie’s hand in the darkened room. The love confessions could wait until they’d both gotten a good night’s sleep. </p><p>Besides, in a way, Alex thought Maggie might already know. </p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>
  <a href="http://moonlight-breeze-44.tumblr.com/">Stalk me on Tumblr</a>
</p><p>Prompts are open, but very slow! Thanks for your patience! &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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